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Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Loves of my Life

#1. Running.

I love running more than anything else right now. I love pulling on my spandex underarmour tights, squeezing into my compression shirts, wiggling my fingers into running gloves, covering my head with a nike knit cap, tying up the laces of my shoes, stretching the muscles of my legs until they cry for mercy, twisting around until the muscles of my entire upper body are loose; and then opening the door and stepping out into the frosty winter atmosphere, hearing the snow crunch beneath my feet as I take in a deep breath and feel the sharp air bite my lungs; and then setting off. The wind chaps my nose and lips until they bleed and after the first one or two miles I lose all feeling in my fingers and toes. My body, my mind and my soul get into a rhythm, a groove, and I don't pull out until every particle of my mental and physical body is so exhausted that continuing on is not an option.

After a hard day at school, there is nothing that makes me feel better than lacing up my faithful tennis shoes and going for a 6 mile run.

#2. Shontelle & The Script.

What am I gonna to do when the best part of me was always you?♥
-the script

"T-shirt" - Shontelle.

"Breakeven (Falling to Pieces)" - The Script.

"Impossible" - Shontelle.

#3. Black and White.


(why is this picture sideways?? I dont know how to fix it. )

(^^^^the picture above was taken around the holidays, when I still had that 15 extra pounds sitting on my torso.)


Tuesday, February 1, 2011

my life be like, ooh ahh.

To give you a break from all those morose posts I've been writing lately, I'm writing a post when I'm happy. So, enjoy, because the mood's not gonna last long. :)

I love school.

Before you start clapping with joy, let me explain. I love school, as in honors chemistry, AP english, AP geography. I love school, as in the subjects, as in learning.

I already have my whole life mapped out. Of course, I went those stages in my life where I was thoroughly convinced that I was gonna be a famous actress, then a singer, then a painter, then a know all those dreams that we become rapidly fixated on and then discard just as quickly. But underneath these passing fads, I've always clung to Teacher as an occupation, and its becoming clearer and clearer that this is what I want to do.

If I do PSEO after sophomore year (which I am going to do), which would be when I was freshman age (15), then I would graduate college at 19, get my Masters in English at 21, and then phD at 23 or 24 and then I could start teaching college immediately. When I think of this, I know this is what God wants me to do. Sure, I'd be teaching kids just a year or so younger than me...but when have I let age hinder me from anything I want to do? My friends have always been older than me. I honestly don't have a good friend who is younger or even the same age as me. And now I'm in classes with sixteen to eighteen year olds. Who cares? Age doesn't matter to me anymore.

I love learning more than anything...I know that sounds incredibly nerdy, but its true. I read Biochemistry textbooks in my spare time. And now I'm beginning to love public school as well. Like sincerely. Yeah, obviously there's stuff that's hard for me. Like waking up at 5:00 AM every morning. Like leaving my house every day at 6:30, and seeing my little siblings growing up and not being there at home to experience it. But that just makes me want to spend every spare second I have with them, and I never felt that way before. My family was always a nuisiance to me, or at least something I took for granted...and now all I want to do when I get home is spend time with them. That is a gift straight from God and it's healing relationships faster than I ever thought possible.

I know this has nothing to do with anything, but I think it fits into the whole theme of happiness. I lost 10 pounds in the last month! I've always been insecure about my weight, always wishing I was skinnier. Then about a month ago, I went to the blood doctor for some tests, and they weighed me on their big official scale. 133 pounds. When I'm only 5'6". I freaked...133 lbs to me is overweight, or at least chubby. (I'm definitely not saying that if you weigh 133 that you are overweight.) So I got down to work. I cut about half of my daily intake of calories, and I started exercising obsessively. Sometimes I would only eat three eggs, carrots, and salad all day. For lunch, instead of bringing a whole bagel peanut butter sandwhich, energy bar, granola bar, apples, fruit snacks and raisans, I brought two hard boiled eggs and carrot. My friends tease me about those eggs, but I eat two every day for lunch, and thats it. I'm very proud of myself, I've kept up that diet almost all this month. For breakfast, I have some form of egg, usually a fried one with a little bit of salt. For dinner, I like salad, sometimes a soup or a small serving of pasta. I usually eat some sort of green with dinner, like broccoli. I am down to 123 pounds...and still dropping! I've started speed and strength with my friends after school and I'm starting track soon. I feel incredible. (:

Sorry this was a short post. Hopefully I'll get back into the swing of posting regularly. Not promising anything, but I'll try. I'm off to running. (:

Until later,


PS. Got asked to the winter formal! (:

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